The photo above is me in 1995, my first L.A. photo shoot. I look powerful and badass, which I should have felt because I had just been scouted on the sidewalk, introduced and set up for a shoot with an impossibly cool photographer.

During the shoot, he nonchalantly said, "Huh? You're prettier than I expected." and at the end, he referred me to Elite and Ford the two most significant agencies at the time. I signed with Elite a few days later. It was a dream come true for a girl raised on Seventeen Magazine in the era of supermodels.

But... there was a problem, well many. At that point in my life, my beliefs were strong and consisted of, I'm not worthy, and I don't belong. I felt anything but badass. I blushed anytime I was asked what I did, I would squeak out almost inaudibly, "I model" then I would turn into a beet. My blushing was severe and debilitating,  and the embarrassment about the blushing only made me redder.

One way I could feel in control was my severe eating disorders that had started before but got really real during that period. What I see now is, I didn't feel worthy of being nourished, and I didn't feel worthy of taking up space, so I attempted to shrink myself. I used outrageous workouts and rigid scheduling for eating, sleeping, and exercise as punishment. I was a literal "hot mess," even though those old photos show something completely different.

​It was like living in a cage of pretend. I pretended to be cool and together and perfect, but I was coming apart at the seems under that sleek exterior. I never experienced much success in that career because I didn't own my power, my truth, or my beauty. In that state of mind and that state of being, I was caught by dysmorphia, and when I looked in the mirror, I saw a troll.

​My saving grace and my versions of power posing through this period were my three besties; we were all seekers, navigating our way through young adulthood. We had precious conversations about who we were and why, and who we hoped to become.

I also did extensive work with Landmark Education, my first exposure to a-ha moments and transformation.

Additionally, yoga and the study of yogic philosophy were starting to get super interesting to me.

Finally and thankfully, I had enough. I woke up one day and chose healing, self-compassion, authenticity and my brilliance  I quit modeling because in fact it was killing me, and at the time it was taking me far away from my truth. I was completly out of alignment.

I'd like to say my journey was quick and I had it all figured out in 6 months, but no... It's been 23 years, and I'm still tweaking behaviors and beliefs every day to uncover my truth. However, the growth and healing that has occurred in the last five years have been exponential.

How? I finally invested in support and structured accountability in the form of therapy, coaching, and personal growth study. I  also chose to open my heart over the old pattern of isolation so that I could establish and in some cases re-establish a tribe of supportive, loving, souls.

Flash forward to today. 
Work in progress? Always! 
A woman who practices non-negotiable self-care, rest and fun based on self-love? 
Check! 
A woman who surrounds herself with supportive energizing people who love and want her to succeed? 
Check!
A woman who is ending a family legacy of self-sacrifice, depression, hiding and self-medicating, by modeling self-love, authenticity, and bold self-expression to her daughter? 
Check!
A woman who has found her purpose and is willing to share her gifts with the world? 
Check! 
A woman who can get up in front of almost 1000 people and share her truth in service of people breaking open to their version of brilliance? 
Check!

I don't share this in a "look at me I'm so great and evolved" way, but, as evidence that if I can do it... your dreams and your best-fulfilled life are possible too. If you have had enough of the limiting behaviors and beliefs that hold you back and you are ready to uplevel and move towards your dreams now. I want to invite you to The Oxygen Mask 3 part Workshop series starting on May 4th.

​I have carefully curated, exercises and practices to make a perfect starter course. I intend to help you bring awareness to the patterns that are holding you, hostage so that you can finally move through them and find some freedom on the other side.
Click here for more info

​Our plane was shifting in a big way seemingly on every available axis. We were warned over the loudspeaker that the ride would be rough, but this was ridiculous! My family was in the back, my daughter next to me and we were thoroughly experiencing the "tail slide" that the pilot blamed for canceling the drink and snack service. Several times I thought about those little oxygen masks falling from the space above us, and as my daughter lay in my lap battling motion sickness. I kept playing "in case of an emergency..." in my head.

"Put the mask on her first",  my head and heart exclaimed.

I quickly corrected my self, "No my mask first."

 It was the weirdest thing to observe the argument in my head. 

"No, it feels right and makes sense to take care of my young, scared, almost ill child, actually it seems absurd not to put her first. "

"Wait wait wait, me first so that I can serve others! "

Back and forth it went. We never had that emergency, and if we did, I would have followed the instructions and masked myself first. But, holy cow what a clear picture I got that night about how and why it's so hard to commit to self-care.

Most of us are experts at self-sacrifice, we somehow believe that if we put everyone and everything else first, we will be satisfied because we feel in control,  and everyone else will be happy due to us. Self-sacrifice is seen mistakenly as a sacred duty. Well let me tell you, that is absolute B.S., but that pattern runs deep in us. The truth is when we put ourselves last, not only are we miserable, withdrawn, and resentful, but our relationships, passions and purpose suffer as well.

The Commitment to self-care is just like the oxygen mask argument I was having with my self. Me/them? Me/them? Where we get confused is in the plane our lives depend on a commitment to self, and in real life it doesn't feel that way. I would argue that those feelings are incorrect and that your life, if you want to be well, fulfilled, connected, impactful, and in full expression of your greatness, entirely depends on it!

​So if...

• You feel guilty about setting quality time aside for yourself.
• Your inner voice says, “There’s not enough time” or “Something, or someone else is always more important.”
• You feel drained, unmotivated, or filled with self-doubt, but are willing to find another way.
• Your relationships at home, at work, and out in the greater community are suffering.
• You want to make a bigger impact and have a deeper connection, but you feel too spent?

I invite you to The Oxygen Mask 3 part Workshop series. Over the course of 3 sessions using mindfulness, gentle movement, and communication we will work through specific steps, befriend and revise our limiting beliefs, and create a system for successful self-care based on self-love. 

The Steps:
​
Step 1. Step back so that you can connect to the vision of what life would look like if your prioritized yourself - build awareness around those automatic and sometimes subconscious limiting beliefs around self-care so you can choose differently at the moment.

Step 2. Let go of habits and beliefs that hold you back from self-care and self-love.

Step 3. Say yes in an empowered way to yourself and what you want to create.

Step 4. Discover what your next best step is, formulate a plan and take empowered action.

Step 5. Set up accountability around your self-care so that success is inevitable. 

​Thursdays 5:30-7pm,
5/3, 5/10, 5/17
@ Pure Body Bliss.91 E Croy St B, Hailey
$75.
Space is limited, contact me for more info.

If you ready for this workshop, but not near Hailey, Idaho. Please contact me to share your interest. I have a virtual version in the works, with a wait list.

​There I was in my freezing cold car in the grocery store parking proving miracles can happen anytime anyplace.

I was in the middle of a coaching call, and my coach asked,
“What  will having a successful coaching practice do for you?”

I answered, “It will show me that I have finally tapped into my magic, that I’m sustaining it and sharing it and inspiring others to find theirs. 

She asked, “Have you ever felt your magic before?”

I said, “Yes” and told this story –

​After our life-flight to a metro hospital, my daughter was born during an emergency delivery six weeks before her due date. As intense as that time was, I was called to create magic. I was the most poised, present, wise, and fierce version of myself. I advocated like a warrior for her to leave the NICU thriving and healthy.

​ During that month in the hospital, many serious decisions came up. Sometimes the professionals advised one thing, and my gut said another. I always went with my gut. Make no mistake when we went home she was small, but she was mighty.

Whitney replied, “So your daughter is your anchor for your magic.”

​Let me tell you my world turned upside down, and this is why…

Once we were out of the hospital, we shifted into new parent survival mode. She started a 12-week bout with Colic on her actual due date. My husband and I were ready to drive the family off a cliff. I was isolated because she couldn’t be around germs. As she grew into a toddler, we had the tyrannical 2’s, 3’s, and 4’s.  She was the most spirited, energetic, button pushing, raging (when she wanted to be) kid, I had met, and I had confirmation from other veteran parents. 

Because I am a human meaning-making machine, Guess what I made these challenges mean?

The voice in my head sounded like this:

I didn’t deserve to have the magical natural birth I wanted, because people like me didn’t deserve things like that. The new mommy’s group wasn’t a possibility which was typical because I never got to belong anywhere. I was so damaged to the core that I had produced the Tasmanian devil, and my parenting was so bad that I had no control which made sense because I could never get it right in life. My laundry list of sad proofs went on and on.

My realization in the car that day was, “Holy smokes, I’ve been using my beautiful girl to anchor all of my disappointments, resentments, and shortcoming. I did that for six years… 

​In one magical moment my coach pointed out – “your daughter is your anchor for your magic.”

... And everything changed.  Now when I look at her, all I see is magic. When I anchored my inner sorcerer and took action from that place, miracles appeared everywhere, in my relationship with myself and others, my work, my capacity for creation and gratitude and love.  

I see this experience as evidence that; 

• Reframes are within us and available any time. 
• We are all so much more capable, and courageous than we give ourselves credit for.
• When we stand in that power and take action from that place, miracles in all areas of our lives are right there at our fingertips.  

Reach out if you are ready for a more magical perspective!

... Way more then you let yourself believe... ​What circumstances are keeping you from living your dreams? Are you too busy, too broke, too old, is it the kids, the hubby, your job?

I have been there too. 

My old story was, I couldn't afford to invest in my happiness. I lived day in and day out wanting something more. I had a deep urge to find my purpose, a strong desire to step into my power, and an intense wish to serve and make an impact.

But...
"I couldn't afford it."
My circumstances were more powerful than my dreams. Simple as that. I was not able to hold the vision of what I wanted, my life situation was in control and that totally sucked.

​How did I move from stuck?

Looking back, I can see how I  started and continued to build a group of loving and unshakable supporters, who held space and acted as resources as I began to shake up my career, my life, and step into my value by investing more time and money into my growth.

Those supporters believed enough in me so that I could start to believe in myself which translated into the seemingly magical creation of cash. (literally, I adopted a wonderful high-end private pilates clientele overnight when a seasoned and well-loved teacher moved to another city).

As I increased my possibility in the form of cash, I was able to start hiring support. My counselor supported and stretched me beyond my limiting beliefs and helped me heal from my past traumas. I  stepped into my power a little more and began to discover my purpose. I  wanted to coach and help people create the experience that they wanted to have just like I was. I found a coaching school, and I wanted to hire a private coach.

But...
"I couldn't afford it."
My circumstances were more powerful than my dreams. Simple as that. I was not able to hold the vision of what I wanted, my life situation was in control and that totally sucked.

Fortunately, ​When I couldn't stand for my dreams, my supporters did. I hired a coach and she supported me through my fear and stretched me into what was really possible and guess what, I excelled in school and will be graduating in November. I still have a roof over my head and a budding, purposeful, exciting, and lucrative career.

As I increased the possibility of who I was becoming, I knew I could move so much more quickly with support to grow into that person. I had a re-enrollment conversation with my coach. It was big; this was the ticket, I knew all the way to my bones.

But...
"I couldn't afford it."
My circumstances were more powerful than my dreams. Simple as that. I was not able to hold the vision of what I wanted, my life situation was in control and that totally sucked.

Once again, when I couldn't stand for my possibility, I was so lucky to have created and invested in a massive support structure that could.  Without it I would still be living in "I can't afford it" and that would totally suck.

​As your coach, I am a stand for your dreams, even when life throws you unexpected curve balls and you feel too busy, too broke, too old, or maybe it's the kids, the hubby, or your job, even when you think your circumstances or more powerful than your dreams. I will support and stretch you so that you can have the experience you want and so much more.

Coaching is all about creating the experience you want to have. To get a feel for what it is and to be clear about what it isn't, schedule a complimentary clarity session today. You are worth it.